One-off Challenge 25: Drive Something I've Never Driven Before

This challenge is courtesy of…

Douglas Strachan

The challenge

A nice, straightforward one this one. Technically  I guess I could have claimed it when I drove a Nissan X-trail hire car for work but  contrary to appearances, I do actually prefer trying to do these challenges in the spirit in which they're intended. For this challenge  clearly we're talking something substantively different to a regular car, not just a random car I haven't driven before. Something big or something with an unusual number of wheels. 

Or something fast. 

Yes, let's go with fast (not least because Donna and Dougie gave me a very kind, very early birthday present of a supercar experience day).

Don't worry, this will be the last appearance by Clarkson on this blog.
Don and Doug actually got me a voucher for a supercar day waaaay back in autumn but it turned out that the first available session wasn't until the 16th of March, just squeaking in under the 40th wire. So, with some trepidation, I signed up.

The first challenge was finding where I was supposed to go. The answer was the world's coldest portacabin, well hidden in the arse end of East Fortune Airfield. There I signed the most alarming waiver ever basically absolving the organisers of anything up to and including the apocalypse and endured a really, really boring safety briefing  (Top tip: don't crash.) 

Well, that's a mite alarming... 
Then came the single most extreme challenge I've ever faced. 

Standing in the sleet for twenty minutes in the Scottish winter.

By Christ it was cold  It was so cold that I got an ice-cream headache without the enjoyment of eating an ice-cream first. Then, finally, I got my turn on my car of choice, a Lamborgini Guillano (or something like that - I'll be honest, I'm not a petrolhead). 

Brummmmmm, bruummmmmm! 
The first thing you notice getting in to a Lamborgini is that it's exceptionally cramped. (Or, at least, it is if you're 6'4".)

Does the seat go back any further? How about down? No? OK, well, I guess I'll steer with my knees then... 
The second thing is that it's surprisingly downmarket feeling inside. It feels like a mid-price travelling salesman's car from the 90s.

It does not, it is safe to say, drive like one. 

It's kind of difficult to describe the driving experience, as it's basically driving, but more so. Despite the horrible weather, the car stuck to the road like it was attached with velcro. At some point the instructor pressed a button I can only imagine was labelled "holy fucknuggets!", because that was certainly my reaction. The car went faster and louder. 

After my four laps I'd forgotten about the cramped conditions and the ghosts of salesmen past and it was just me and the road. And an instructor flinching slightly in well, but not entirely, disguised fear. 
 Challenge complete!

Will I do it again?

I guess if Brexit goes to shit and I need to branch out into crime I could have a thriving career as a getaway driver, but other than that, probably not. 

Long-term updates

French words "learned" (according to the memrise app):1,082! (Although this now includes a few Dutch words in preparation for our trip to Brugge.) 
Daily photos taken? Yes.
Swordfighting learnt: That if you do not go swordfighting for more than a month, your body will punish you for it when you go back.
I am currently reading: Still nope.
"Cheat" days on food since last week: Two. It's been a busy, difficult week.
"Cheat" days on exercise:  Does shivering in the sleet count? 
My favourite drawing:  Still haven't done any. Better pick up my pencils this week  In the meantime, here's one I did earlier but didn't post as it was the surprise prize for the winner of the guess the poorly rendered local landmark competition. 
Castle-ish. 

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